I just finished reading Wild: From
Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail, Cheryl Strayed's memoir
about hiking from California to Oregon after the death of her mother
sends her life spiraling downward. I'm still aching from the
powerful punch of this story, delivered with so much grace and humor
that I didn't even see it coming.
This book didn't just knock my socks
off. It knocked off my t-shirt, jeans and knickers, too. It's a
gripping adventure story that's brutally honest on every emotional
level, and I was left open-mouthed with awe by Strayed's brilliant
observations about everything from what it feels like to wake up with
thousands of tiny frogs hopping on your body to her profound grief
over the dissolution of her family.
As a writer, I've been mulling over
this book, trying to think about what made this memoir—along with
others I've loved by writers like Bill Bryson, Mary Carr, Alexandra
Fuller, Haven Kimmel, Peter Matthiessen, Michael Ondaatje, and David
Sedaris—rise to the level of art that's good for the soul. Here
are a few thoughts:
Make Your Memoir about More than Just
You
Unless you're Bill Clinton or Mick
Jagger, nobody but your best friend cares about your life story (and
she might be pretending). How can you make your memoir compelling?
Find something unique about your narrative and focus the book around
that instead of navel gazing about your first dog, your last lover,
etc. For instance, Haven Kimmel does a brilliant job of this in
Zippy: Growing Up Small in Mooreland, Indiana. She broke out
big with this book by weaving her hilarious observations of
small-town life around her own coming-of-age story. And, in The
Snow Leopard, Peter Matthiessen writes about traveling in Nepal
and tracking the snow leopard as he asks some of the deepest
life-and-death questions common to all mankind. We learn about the
flora, fauna, and culture of the deep Himalaya as we follow his
spiritual quest and the two narratives meld to create a mystical,
timeless read.
Don't Whine.
Enough said.
Do Your Research
Whether you're writing about kayaking
through Brazil after your Wall Street breakdown or the summer at Aunt
Mary's lake cabin when your father went nuts, do your research. This
means reading up on Brazilian history and wildlife or interviewing
family members until your memories of that lake cabin become vivid
and true. (You'll be amazed by how much your memories differ from,
say, your little brother's.)
Be Respectful
Here's the thing: you may have grown
up in a dysfunctional family —if you're a writer, the odds are
pretty high that this is fact. But writers, no matter how neglected
or abused we were in our youth, have an unfair advantage: We have
public voices. The people we're writing about often don't. Think
long and hard about baring other people's secrets without asking
permission.
Be Generous
Okay, so your mom liked to stand on
her head naked in the back yard and forgot to pack your lunches for
school. It was a tough life! But the point of writing a memoir
about it is to show how you resolved conflicts, just like any
character in a novel. This isn't therapy. The story has to go
somewhere. The best memoirs are those where writers arrive at a
place of acceptance and even forgiveness—as Mary Carr, Alexandra
Fuller, and Cheryl Strayed do in their books.
Build a Narrative with Tension and
Shape
From that first scene, you want to
build enough tension into the narrative so that readers are turning
pages to find out what happens. Think about the natural start and
end points, and what the climax of the story looks like. Each
chapter should be shaped like that as well, with its own narrative
arc.
Play with Time
Your memoir doesn't have to be
chronological. For instance, Strayed does a great job of playing
with time, starting the book in the middle of her journey, at a point
where her hiking boot literally tumbles off a cliff, then
backtracking to where she was before she left. She proceeds on her
trip and backtracks many times throughout the book to highlight
various high (and low) points in her life story. By the time we
finish reading about her journey, we understand why she had no choice
but to walk the Pacific coast alone to mend her heart and soul.
Now that, my friends, is a truly great memoir.